I neglect this blog terribly. I started it because my Other Blog had become too familiar and "known" by Real People. I came over here to be more anonymous, so I could write things I wanted to write but felt I could not post at the Other Blog. Plus, I also recognized that my Other Blog was becoming far too boring because I KNEW I had an audience, and I was pretty much writing for that audience, instead of writing for ME. So I started this Blog, and then I realized that whatever I posted here (outside Sunday Scribblings, of course) was basically anonymous and completely ignored by the Universe, and that offended me because I felt I was saying really significant and important things.
What a Narcissistic Blow-Hard I am, huh?
Yeah, well, so what? I DON'T CARE. And you know WHY I don't care? Because I turned 40 more than a week ago, and it did NOT bother me one iota!
A lot of really good things happened to me in my 30s, but a lot of really bad stuff happened to me, too. As my 40th birthday loomed on the horizon, I took stock and realized that I was starting off this new decade in my life in a very, very good place. I have a fabulous new house, a job that I love (which is, nicely, recession-proof), and I have GREAT kids, lots of friends, and a wonderful (although small) family. Yeah, I'm overweight and single with Lots O' Baggage, but that is OKAY. I have learned that I can take care of myself. I have accepted--FINALLY--that I'm smart and talented and I deserve everything that has come to me because I earned it.
And you know what I did for my 40th birthday? (Well, on the actual day, I flew to Washington, D.C. for a work trip, so I really didn't celebrate until 4 days after my actual birthday.)
I threw myself a PARTY!
It was a New House/Promotion/40th Birthday Party, and while I struggled with the audacity of throwing myself my own party, I also recognized that nobody was going to do it for me, and, dammit, I wanted to have a party! I spent hundreds of dollars on groceries and booze, and I invited everybody I knew--co-workers, Boy Scout Parents, College friends, High School friends, Church people--you name them, I invited them.
It was a lot of work, but it was wonderful! I have an awesome house. I'm also an awesome cook. My friends and co-workers are awesome people with cool kids. What's not to love?
Tomorrow, I am hostessing a Women's Group from Church. Next Friday, I will be hostessing a Scrapbooking party. A few weeks after that, I have out-of-town company coming for a visit during Balloon Fiesta, so I am already planning a Weekend Itinerary of all things glorious and wonderful about New Mexico (besides Hot Air Balloons), like the World's Longest Tram, the Jetsons-inspired Spaceship House, a Miraculous Staircase within a small, old church in Santa Fe, a haunted restaurant housed in the Oldest Residence in Albuquerque, fresh-roasted green chile, and home-cooked meals served on my Back Patio with a fantastic view of amazing and awe-inspiring sunsets.
I no longer sit around feeling sorry for myself. I'm BUSY--I've got things to do, people to see, places to go...
Unfortunately, that also means my garage is still filled with boxes of stuff I have yet to unpack, not to mention my Ex-Husband's Worldly Possessions (he got divorced from the StepMonster and is back in town, living with his parents for now, and storing his "stuff" in my garage and in my shed because despite being a highly-empowered Woman of Substance, I am still incapable of being a complete Asshole to anyone that my kids happen to care about. SHUT UP!)
40 is good. I'm totally okay with turning 40, and I honestly don't "get" why it is such a huge issue for so many women. Women who have trouble turning 40 must be women who have lived their lives based on "their looks." They freak out at 40 because that's when "aging" becomes visibly apparent. If you base your value to the world on "how you look," well, then I guess turning 40 is a problem. But, I'm happy to report, it was NOT a problem for ME!
I have always had to rely on my brains, my wit, and my personality because I never have been much to look at. It has served me well--I don't need superficial attention to validate my existence. I am who I am right now, and I have finally, for once in my life, STOPPED caring about what "other people" think about me. I care what my friends think. I care what my family thinks. I care what my co-workers think. But I don't really care what anyone else thinks.
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Coffee
Years ago, when my kids were little, and I was sleep-deprived, I couldn't leave for work without two large travel mugs full of coffee. I had a 30-minute commute and would suck down the equivalent of about 4 mugs of coffee during my journey. I love the way coffee smells, but I have to drink it with milk (or, better yet, cream) and artificial sweetener. I refused to buy my coffee at coffee shops, particularly Starbuck's (which I consider to be an Evil Empire, forcing thousands of small, independent coffee shop owners out of business.) It seemed like an atrocious waste of money, especially when I could make it at home--I even had an Espresso machine, so I could make my own lattes.
I only drank coffee on weekdays. On the weekends, I rarely drank it. And I didn't drink it for the caffeine buzz because I honestly couldn't feel any effects from the caffeine. I could drink coffee at 11:30 at night, and be sound asleep by midnight. I think I probably drank coffee all the way up until my divorce. My ex drank coffee--tons of it. He had to have non-dairy creamer (not milk) and about 3 spoonfuls of sugar in his. After he moved out, I stopped drinking coffee. I think I made it for him, really, rather than for me--I just drank it because it was there. I suffered no withdrawal symptoms. I just got up one morning and didn't make coffee. Simple as that.
I've always been more of a tea-drinker, and I drink my tea the same way I drank my coffee--only with a little less milk and about half a package of artificial sweetener. I can also drink my tea "straight up" without milk or sweetener--something I could never do with coffee. I love everything about tea--I love tea cups and saucers and tea pots that come in all shapes and sizes. Admittedly, I most often drink my tea in a coffee mug, but I own plenty of tea cups and they are the first thing I look for in antique stores. I have this lovely dream of owning a Bed and Breakfast someday, with a fancy Tea Room for the locals. I will serve up the tea in my vast "collection" of tea cups and saucers, acquired from antique stores. I rarely drink tea on weekdays--I'm always in a rush on weekday mornings and tea is not something that can be rushed. Tea is for drinking when you can curl up on the couch or read the newspaper on your back patio. It is made for those times when you have peace and quiet. Tea does not belong in Travel Mugs or paper cups. It belongs on a table, in a proper cup.
It is no wonder that tea drinkers in the United States are discriminated against. Coffee is the beverage of America. It's bold and brash and arrogant. If you have a cup of coffee in your hand, everyone else can smell it. Taking a "coffee break" is a perfectly acceptable excuse to leave your desk. Tea? Not so much. If you order "hot tea" at a restaurant, they either bring you a tiny little pot of hot water or a single mug of hot water with a single tea bag. If you ask for more hot water, they expect you to re-use that same tea bag. Yeck! I hate weak tea! I use my tea bags once, and throw them away! Coffee drinkers, on the other hand, get unlimited refills, without having to ask. Tea drinkers have to flag down a waiter or waitress and request additional hot water and additional tea bags, and sometimes they CHARGE you for an additional tea bag! Why is that when coffee beans cost far more than tea? I know some tea drinkers who actually carry extra tea bags around in their purses for this very reason. Hotels will put tea bags in the little caddy next to the 4-cup coffee-maker, but you can't drink tea from a coffee-maker because it will always taste like coffee. And they put out exactly two tea bags--one regular and one decaf. Phffffft!
My mother was a tea-drinker. She drank tea all day long, probably anywhere from 6 to 10 cups a day, and then she always had iced tea with dinner. She was an Earl Grey fan, and while I like Earl Grey, I'm happiest with plain ol' English Breakfast. Sometimes I'll try the flavored teas, but I'm still most content with a basic, traditional, black tea.
My father attended a conference in Victoria, British Columbia about 15 years ago, and my mother and my sister accompanied him on his trip. I was unable to go--can't exactly remember why now because this was before I had children--probably a work conflict. They visited Butchart Gardens and had "High Tea" at the Empress Hotel. I was immensely jealous, and vow that someday before I die, I will spend a weekend in Victoria! It was during this trip that my mother discovered Murchie's Tea--that's what the Empress Hotel serves. She brought back boxes and boxes of Murchie's Tea, and gave me a box containing a sampler of the various blends, including the Empress Afternoon blend served at the Hotel, and the Golden Jubilee blend, created for Queen Elizabeth. While she would still buy tea at Trader Joe's or specialty shops, Murchie's became her regular supplier. Shipping and handling wasn't cheap, but to her it was worth every penny for good quality tea. She never drank Lipton's or Bigelow tea ever again.
She had placed a large order with Murchie's just before she went into the hospital. It arrived a few days after she died. I can only imagine how my Dad felt the moment he opened up the box that was delivered to his doorstep. At her Memorial Service, we put out a tray of tea bags in a multitude of blends, so everyone could enjoy a good cup of tea in her memory. She had an entire cabinet in her kitchen filled with various teas--all kinds of flavors, many of them gifts from friends and family because everyone who knew her, knew how much she liked her tea. My father, a coffee drinker, asked me if I wanted the Murchie's tea, and I jumped at the chance. Even though I didn't drink tea very often, it was something that I closely connected with my mother, so of course I wanted the tea. There are two boxes (with 75 tea bags per box) of Earl Grey, a box of English Afternoon, and a box of Golden Jubilee in one of my kitchen cabinets.
I drink much more tea now than I used to--because whenever I fix a cup of tea, I think of my mother. While I don't drink tea every day, I drink it almost every day, and, like my mom, sometimes I fix it in the middle of the day or after dinner, not just in the mornings.
I may never drink coffee ever again--it's my way of showing solidarity and preserving my mother's memory.
I only drank coffee on weekdays. On the weekends, I rarely drank it. And I didn't drink it for the caffeine buzz because I honestly couldn't feel any effects from the caffeine. I could drink coffee at 11:30 at night, and be sound asleep by midnight. I think I probably drank coffee all the way up until my divorce. My ex drank coffee--tons of it. He had to have non-dairy creamer (not milk) and about 3 spoonfuls of sugar in his. After he moved out, I stopped drinking coffee. I think I made it for him, really, rather than for me--I just drank it because it was there. I suffered no withdrawal symptoms. I just got up one morning and didn't make coffee. Simple as that.
I've always been more of a tea-drinker, and I drink my tea the same way I drank my coffee--only with a little less milk and about half a package of artificial sweetener. I can also drink my tea "straight up" without milk or sweetener--something I could never do with coffee. I love everything about tea--I love tea cups and saucers and tea pots that come in all shapes and sizes. Admittedly, I most often drink my tea in a coffee mug, but I own plenty of tea cups and they are the first thing I look for in antique stores. I have this lovely dream of owning a Bed and Breakfast someday, with a fancy Tea Room for the locals. I will serve up the tea in my vast "collection" of tea cups and saucers, acquired from antique stores. I rarely drink tea on weekdays--I'm always in a rush on weekday mornings and tea is not something that can be rushed. Tea is for drinking when you can curl up on the couch or read the newspaper on your back patio. It is made for those times when you have peace and quiet. Tea does not belong in Travel Mugs or paper cups. It belongs on a table, in a proper cup.
It is no wonder that tea drinkers in the United States are discriminated against. Coffee is the beverage of America. It's bold and brash and arrogant. If you have a cup of coffee in your hand, everyone else can smell it. Taking a "coffee break" is a perfectly acceptable excuse to leave your desk. Tea? Not so much. If you order "hot tea" at a restaurant, they either bring you a tiny little pot of hot water or a single mug of hot water with a single tea bag. If you ask for more hot water, they expect you to re-use that same tea bag. Yeck! I hate weak tea! I use my tea bags once, and throw them away! Coffee drinkers, on the other hand, get unlimited refills, without having to ask. Tea drinkers have to flag down a waiter or waitress and request additional hot water and additional tea bags, and sometimes they CHARGE you for an additional tea bag! Why is that when coffee beans cost far more than tea? I know some tea drinkers who actually carry extra tea bags around in their purses for this very reason. Hotels will put tea bags in the little caddy next to the 4-cup coffee-maker, but you can't drink tea from a coffee-maker because it will always taste like coffee. And they put out exactly two tea bags--one regular and one decaf. Phffffft!
My mother was a tea-drinker. She drank tea all day long, probably anywhere from 6 to 10 cups a day, and then she always had iced tea with dinner. She was an Earl Grey fan, and while I like Earl Grey, I'm happiest with plain ol' English Breakfast. Sometimes I'll try the flavored teas, but I'm still most content with a basic, traditional, black tea.
My father attended a conference in Victoria, British Columbia about 15 years ago, and my mother and my sister accompanied him on his trip. I was unable to go--can't exactly remember why now because this was before I had children--probably a work conflict. They visited Butchart Gardens and had "High Tea" at the Empress Hotel. I was immensely jealous, and vow that someday before I die, I will spend a weekend in Victoria! It was during this trip that my mother discovered Murchie's Tea--that's what the Empress Hotel serves. She brought back boxes and boxes of Murchie's Tea, and gave me a box containing a sampler of the various blends, including the Empress Afternoon blend served at the Hotel, and the Golden Jubilee blend, created for Queen Elizabeth. While she would still buy tea at Trader Joe's or specialty shops, Murchie's became her regular supplier. Shipping and handling wasn't cheap, but to her it was worth every penny for good quality tea. She never drank Lipton's or Bigelow tea ever again.
She had placed a large order with Murchie's just before she went into the hospital. It arrived a few days after she died. I can only imagine how my Dad felt the moment he opened up the box that was delivered to his doorstep. At her Memorial Service, we put out a tray of tea bags in a multitude of blends, so everyone could enjoy a good cup of tea in her memory. She had an entire cabinet in her kitchen filled with various teas--all kinds of flavors, many of them gifts from friends and family because everyone who knew her, knew how much she liked her tea. My father, a coffee drinker, asked me if I wanted the Murchie's tea, and I jumped at the chance. Even though I didn't drink tea very often, it was something that I closely connected with my mother, so of course I wanted the tea. There are two boxes (with 75 tea bags per box) of Earl Grey, a box of English Afternoon, and a box of Golden Jubilee in one of my kitchen cabinets.
I drink much more tea now than I used to--because whenever I fix a cup of tea, I think of my mother. While I don't drink tea every day, I drink it almost every day, and, like my mom, sometimes I fix it in the middle of the day or after dinner, not just in the mornings.
I may never drink coffee ever again--it's my way of showing solidarity and preserving my mother's memory.
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